Dichotomous Detroit

My mother grew up in Detroit, Michigan and I spent vacations there visiting my grandparents when I was little.  We'd drive up through Canada and take the tunnel that let out right into downtown.  My mother would promptly hit the locks on her door and wouldn't relax until we got to my grandparents house on Duchess Ave, east of Detroit.  My grandfather worked for Ford and later on for some electric company (I think...I wonder if it was the American Electric Iron Company on Woodward?  I'm not sure or if it was just some local place.  Someday I'll need to ask).

My memories are of emerging out of that tunnel into this huge city, bigger than I had ever seen.  Gawking at crowds of people on the streets, lights, White Castle...what's that mom??  The huge huge streets, some with medians down the middle and gorgeous houses.  My grandparents house was a modest brick house, the neighbors next door had an above ground pool with a slide, I'd never seen such a thing.  My brother and I would longingly stare over the fence and say things in a stage whisper like..."Boy, it sure is HOOOOT out here today!!"  or "Whew!  I feel like I'm melting, how will we ever cool down?"  until the neighbors eventually asked if we wanted to swim, just to shut us up.  We weren't allowed to actually ask them if we could come over...because that would be rude.  Kids!  If our loud whining didn't work my grandfather would get out these 3 metal wash tubs and fill them up with the hose, we'd go sit in them and then my grandmother would come out of the house with ice cream in these fantastic colored plastic dishes on stems, the ice cream would be covered in Magic Shell.  Now I'm sure that there is something very unhealthy about eating something that is liquidy chocolate something or other that hardens when it gets cold...but even today if I see it on the shelves I'll buy it and eat it with Breyer's Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream and I'm transported back to summers in Detroit.  I remember eating them on the screened in porch out front and in the backyard while watching my grandfather in his beautiful garden of lilies or watch him mow with one of those non powered mowers.

I remember almost giving the other next door neighbor a heart attack as I climbed across the top of the swing set.  I remember thinking how weird it was that there were all these alley's behind the houses where the garbage was collected.  I remember listening to a Red Wings hockey game on the radio while watching it with the sound off on the TV, because my grandfather preferred the announcers on the radio...I happen to agree.  He'd also bring us small powdered donuts at least once during our visit.  I also remember vaguely a trip to his work, I remember watching him fiddle with electronic stuff and him explaining that he had gotten shocked so much that he doesn't feel much in his fingertips anymore.

I remember eating at some Dutch? something or other restaurant...it was a buffet and I remember the color red and the fact it was always pretty dark and my grandfather would complain about it.  I remember my grandmother would save scraps off her plate in a napkin that she would put in her purse for the dog.  My grandfather drove everywhere, because my grandmother didn't know how to drive.  He'd take us to the mall that had the big metal hippos and rhino's you could crawl all over.  He'd take us to Belle Isle which had the coolest boat museum with a stethoscope...no telescope...no  oh gosh what are those things called in submarines???  And the creepiest aquarium I've ever been in, but I wanted to go back every time we visited because if I could just make it past the really scary creepy huge tank with the big Garr fish with the sharp teeth that seemed to slink out of the dark murky recesses, I could see my favorite fish the Lion fish in the small tank in the back, next to the equally cool sea horses and then I could go back past the amazing electric eel.  I was in heaven if we were there during a display of the eel's currenty power.  Every single memory I have of Detroit is happy and joyous, which is why it pains me so to see the amount of ruin that is in that city and loss of so many beautiful buildings and places.  Even the aquarium after over 100 years of continuous operation was also closed.

I have a class on being a reference librarian and reference resources for my graduate degree.  One of the projects is a bibliographic essay (an explanation of what that is should be saved for another time).  I chose to research the ruins of Detroit and examine the history behind some of these ruins.  My research has taken me to look at fascinating old maps of the area, books about ruins and social economics, journal articles on increasing green space and social issues and many many websites, pictures and films.  The more I research the more I realize that Detroit is a city of dichotomy, that it has two sides sometimes right next door to each other.  That is it a city that is decaying but on the brink of such great things.  That a neighborhood of decaying houses can be just down the street from a restored mansion. It is beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time.  I am reminded of the photo essay I did on this very subject of dichotomy during my undergraduate degree, but in a very different city, San Francisco.  I have spent days and hours lost in the library and on the web happily immersed in this amazing city.

Hopefully these short movies are viewable. (I took the movies out and just have a link to the page they are on now...it was driving me nuts that I couldn't mute the initial movie.)  They are amazing!  Be aware there is a bunch of badly bleeped cursing and in the middle one a few off color references, but the places and hope that is exhibited in these stories is amazing!  I hope to go back to Detroit someday and continue where I left off and create more good memories in this beautiful hopeful decaying rebuilding city.  Watch Detroit Lives on:  https://www.palladiumboots.eu/

Enjoy!  PS If you want more links to pics and such they are everywhere, but I'm sure I can post some if you want.

wha--th--ell?

I sometimes wonder why people do the things that they do...or dogs for that matter.  Little tiny dachshund puppy walking behind it's owner, suddenly decides to flop on the sidewalk and roll around.  The owner drags him for a couple feet before she realizes that he's just flopped on the ground.  Why?  I mean I've seen dogs do that in grass...but the concrete sidewalk?  Did he have an itch?  Did it smell good??  Who knows the mind of a dog?

Or in terms of a person...why did the lady coming out of Tea & Sympathy have 10 pens stuck to the outside pockets of her purse?  Two in each color...was she afraid she was going to run out of ink?  Does she lose a lot of pens? Does she like to write with all of them at once? Does she label things a lot and are they color-coded?

Or the interesting high school girl on the train who had a collection of zip ties all over her clothes.  Attached to her bracelet, securing the stuffed monkey to the front pocket of her jeans, on the necklace with the hot pink binkie attached, around her belt loops, through the artfully hacked holes in her jeans.  They were all white.  Why? What's with the monkey?  Does the monkey come off? Does she attach it to other things? What's with the binkie?  Ok nevermind I don't want to know...I've seen/read Love in the Time of Cholera....not a picture I want in my head!

Do I have a quirk? Do people look and me and wonder...probably not...unless it's just to wonder what's a small town girl doing in a place like this?

Addition: This had to go in this blog spot, because this is definitely a wth moment!

I know I know you can barely see him...but he's there in white boots and white guitar and white cowboy hat....oh and lets not forget the white speedo, which the guitar is covering up.  So I had to travel all the way from Utah to find a naked cowboy...that seems a bit over the top, I would have thought it would be much easier to find one of those in the wild wild west, but apparently NYC is the place to go if you are in the market.  Especially if white is your thing.  So why?  why?  and why?  I dunno!  He had something written on the back of his...ahems...but I didn't stick around to read it, I'm sure he was protesting something incredibly intelligent and thought provoking like save the panda's....kinda like "no....no....really I read it for the articles.... /shifty eyes" sort of thing.

Can you read the leaves as well?

I found a tiny and delightful restaurant, Tea & Sympathy, it's between 12th and 13th on Greenwich Ave. It is right next to it's brother restaurant A Salt and Battery.  /snort  Out front sits an english cab and in between the two restaurants is the tea shop, manned by a very handsome cashier.  Tea and Sympathy is where you'd take your 7 year old daughter for a treat or your best girlfriend for a chat or your classmates to discuss rare books.  I think A Salt and Battery is there so the boys don't feel overwhelmed by tea and frills, plus it's not really a man sized restaurant, I don't think they'd fit too well.

The restaurant seats 23 at 9 tiny tables and it was packed!  There is no room to wait inside so you have to sit outside while you hope it doesn't rain or snow.  I can hardly believe that the english accented waitresses could even fit between the tables to wait on everyone.  I made it just in time before they stopped their breakfast menu.  I debated between bangers and mash and the scones with clotted cream (butter...people, nothing gross...sheesh!) and jam.  Finally settled on the scones, which were delicious.  Along with a pot of Chai tea, my favorite.

I am horrible at pouring tea, first off I had no idea all these little things would come streaming out of it into my cup...OHHHH that's what this strainer thingy is for!  Ok I'll suck it up this time and I remembered to use the strainer there after.  I certainly wouldn't make it as Kate Middleton...I dripped and spilled and just couldn't quite get that pot to just pour without making a mess.  Oh well, that's what I get for being raised American...I CAN pour coffee quite well.  Each time I finished a cup of that delicious tea, I looked at the bottom of my cup and saw these leaves floating around and thought...where's one of those tea leaf readers when you need 'em?  What does my future hold? Am I going to survive this school and single motherhood thing I've got going on?  It sure would be nice to know at least a little something...don't ya think?

PS tell your friends about Tea & Sympathy I'd highly recommend it!!

Addition 3/26:  I went there with my friend Erica today and it was just as good as the first time, with the added bonus of fantastic conversation!  Bangers and mash...yum yum!  Chocolate vanilla tea...to die for!  Next menu choice Welsh rarebit (which we found out has nothing to do with rabbits, but really seems as if it should) with a side of mac n cheese...I'm pretty sure that's what Erica will get that too.  I'm thinking a cute tea pot and a strainer and some sort of tea recipe book if there is such a thing is really something I need to get/do (plus there's that cute guy that works there...he's probably gay, drat!) ...as well as visit Shoegasm which is just down the street....just the name begs me...pleads with me to shop there!!

Why Being a Parent is Fun...or 5 things I have learned in honor of my 5 kids

1. Kids will eat anything (dirt, baby wipes, watch batteries, the tips of matches, pepto-bismol, anything out of a box, cat food, grass) but they will not eat anything that takes longer than 15 min to make, that has little green things in them (usually that's fresh basil or some other spice), or potatoes.  Also just a note of caution if you make an ice cream cake and even hide it in the freezer outside half of it will be eaten by the next day…I have yet to figure out how to prevent this.

2. Boys will not cry if they think they will get in trouble for it.  An example from my son Max who took a pocketknife and decided to cut the weeds in the backyard with it and promptly stabbed himself in the leg…he knew he wasn't supposed to be using it so he came in the house and cleaned himself off.  Bandaged himself and sat on the couch and read a book.  I found out cuz he was walking funny and I called him on it.  

         Boys will cry if they think it will get someone else in trouble. Same son who is crying hysterically cuz his older brother wrestled him to the ground and sat on him because he thought Max took something of his….go figure that one out…cuz I'm thinking being sat on didn't hurt half as bad as stabbing himself in the leg.

         Girls cry all the time. Because she is the baby of the family and is sure that the brothers will get in trouble for whatever it is that is distressing her.

3. Kids have extremely strange sleeping habits.  They won't go to sleep when they are supposed to…at night.  They do fall asleep on the 5 minute trip to the store and then are cranky when you have to wake them up.  And they can fall asleep anywhere and in any position.  (on the wood floor, folded in half, with half their body off the bed, curled up in a ball between the wall and the vacuum cleaner,  on the stairs, strapped into a car seat, on the toilet, etc…)

4. As early as age 3 boys come to two of the most profound realizations of their life.  Profound because I have heard men over 50 bragging about this ability as if it was acquired from extreme hard work and dedication instead of just being a blessing of anatomy.  Realization 1:  Boys can pee standing up.   Realization 2:  (this being the profound one)  I can now pee anywhere I want.  To which they promptly go experimenting with this by peeing in interesting places (the heating vents, on their sister) until they find the coolest place of all…OUTSIDE….  "Hey anyone here in this family know why I can't get any flowers to grow in this spot here right by the front door."    No one knows till I find all of them outside in the front yard peeing away into my flowers.  I have noticed that this continues to be the favorite place of all adult males.

5.     Boys hate to shop. Lets see how many clothes racks we can destroy in 5 minutes so Mom will end this dreaded excursion so we can go home and play Guitar Hero. This is not necessarily something I learned just an affirmation of long held belief, but Girls love to shop. My daughter Mira at age 2 hugging all the clothes we go by saying "I love you!  I love you!" and who has the girlfriend shopping speak down by age 3 "oh that is beautiful…you look pretty in that….no not that one it's not as nice….."

Musings on the Commute

I have to wonder if this is a bit strange, I'm not sure...  My subway line travels under...actually I'm not sure if it is under anymore...anyway, under Ground Zero.  I can see some of the work through the windows of the subway as I gain glimpses between the plywood sheeting they put up while they are building the memorial.  I feel as if I need to have a moment of silence every time I fly past.  I am essentially riding through a graveyard and it pierces my heart each time.  Maybe it will fade after the hundredth time I travel through.  I wasn't even here when it happened...I was 3000 miles away, but the thought of being there...the idea that if time were different, if my life had moved at a different pace it could have been me on that horrible day.  I am moved that I am traveling on what seems to be sacred ground and I get slightly emotional.  Is that strange?

Trains, Ferries and Subways--Part 4

I'm often surprised at the conversations I hear float around me...not to mention some of the behavior that goes on.

I listened to two people talk about their jobs as funeral directors and how they have "stitched" certain relatives..."oh I stitched my husband, my mother and my cousin...who died."  Really? they died?  Gosh I hope so considering you stitched them!  Mmmk

And then there were the business men who were talking about all the female sales reps in their work place. Not only were all of them incompetent, but for these men it was exactly how they expected it to be and had the male chauvenistic tone of "it is what it is...I mean really what can you do...they are female...who can expect them to do any better".  I have to wonder if they are as good at their jobs as they think they are...I doubt not.  Now I don't really consider myself a feminist but I bristle when I hear stuff like this.  Grrr

Couples really really making out on the ferry seems to be pretty normal.

Lots of singing while listening to ipods, some good, some really bad.

People who think they can beat the closing doors on the subway and get stuck between the two doors...that one actually kinda freaks me out...cuz what happens if the driver doesn't notice?  Shudder....

Funniest thing though was the kid wearing the low riders whose pants actually fell down.  Haha...snort!

So why is it that public transportation seems to encourage people to behave as if they are walking around in "the cone of silence" from Get Smart?  Is it the idea that the more people are surrounding you the more privacy you have because there is such a flood...a sensory overload of people?  I'm not sure...but it makes the 3 hours goes by pretty quickly.

Facial Structure??

Tell me if this isn't the best pick up line ever....even though by the end of the conversation you'll know it really wasn't.

Its been a loooong day!  I've traveled into Manhattan twice, which if you've read previous posts you'll realize it's a 3 hour commute for me.  All I have eaten all day is a piece of pizza and a peppermint patty.  I'm tired and I have the beginning of a really huge headache.  Thursday I take a cab home because it is close to 10pm when I finally get off the ferry.  Sometimes I have to wait a while for a cab, but tonight thank goodness there's one that can take me right away.  I hop in the front seat since there is a couple in the back.  I hop in and tell the driver (who oddly enough is a young and quite good looking young man wearing a fedora....odd because of the good looking part...usually it's old very strange men or just very strange looking men...anywhooo) I tell the driver where to take me.  He looks at me and asks, "By any chance, are you a librarian?" 

I'm sure I looked like a deer caught in the headlights, I'm thinking what the....how the....where did that come from?  Considering I am a librarian I think this is the best pick up line ever, even though I know it's not.  This is some talent he has and I'm sure he puts it to good use.  :P  I say "Well, actually I am."  He laughs and I can almost see him do a fist pump except he's driving and he says "I knew it!"  Conversation goes as follows:

--Do you work at the 42nd branch?

--No, I used to be a librarian I'm going to school to become a real librarian.

(pause) ....ummm but working at that branch would be awesome!  (it's the schwartzman building downtown...gorgeous research branch of NYPL with the lions out front...here's a pic)

--It would be like ghostbusters!

--Haha...mmm yeah...(yes I freely admit I suck at flirting, this being single is a complicated thing I haven't had to deal with for a while)

--So why did you think I was a librarian? (I probably shouldn't have asked this)

--You seem quiet, timid almost (I'm thinking but didn't say...and you got that from me giving you the cross streets of my address??)

--Oh I thought maybe it was the glasses, haha

--Well and the clothes you are wearing (I have a long grey winter coat on...all he can see are my jeans and pink converse sneakers)...oh and your facial structure, (...my facial structure...what does that mean???)...definitely a librarian. (my brain is going over time...should I tell him I'm not quite sure that's a compliment, what do I say to that I have no idea what he means...I'm not timid...am I? maybe I am...hmmm how do I show I'm not timid...I'm going into full on critique mode instead of flirting back or at least trying to assess if he is insulting me or not...my facial structure??? It's my nose isn't it?)

Conversation flowed pretty well after that, I told him my theory on Kindles after he asked what I thought about them, he asked if I had any weird experiences being a librarian...sadly I had to tell him I worked out in a small town and can't remember any weird experiences...although I'm sure it would be different here.  We chatted about the fact he has a huge box of Twinkies in the car...I asked if they were there to keep him awake...yup he works until 5am he likes being up late.  He even offered me one...but I declined.  Unfortunately this is when I showed up at my door and had to get out.  Which is what I did...I actually wouldn't mind continuing the conversation if only to find out what the facial structure comment meant...is that like saying she has a nice personality??  I'm just super curious.  I wish I had at least gotten his name, so I don't have to think of him as the-good-looking-cab-driver-in-a-fedora.  But I don't think well on my feet, I guess I am a timid librarian...hopefully a little better than Mary in her non George world in It's a Wonderful Life.  I look forward to more conversational practice though I obviously need it.